I Remember
by The Caged Bird
Summary: [Oneshot][Shounen ai] The pain is just too much...but I want to remember. The pairing is hidden within the story. See if you can figure it out.


**Here is my first oneshot. Since I posted such a large chapter in _Light and Dark_, I thought I'd treat myself to a non-_LnD_ story. Let me know how you like it. It's tragic, because I wanted to write something non-fluffy…just to see if I could do it.**

**Disclaimer:** Naruto is not mine.

**Story Notes:** Each of the paragraphs are exactly one hundred words long. Each line in-between is exactly ten words long. I left hints in there as to the identity of the lovers. See if you can catch them. The total story is exactly 1,000 words long.

**Warning: **Shounen-ai, tragic

* * *

I remember the first time we saw each other. It seemed like ages. I remember hearing my name, and I turned to see who called me. There you were, in the hall, your arms arrogantly crossed as usual. I remember having a fleeting thought, _How does he know my name when I don't know his? _I demanded to know, never one for subtleties. After you answered, I remember thinking that there was no way I would ever tolerate your presence. We fought that day. We fought again after, but that was the beginning. I remember answering you felt almost natural. 

If I had known then, I would have walked away.

I remember the first time I laughed around you. You had spoken to Lee with such bland passivity in answer to his outrageous statements. I laughed. The look on your face…you were shocked. So was I. I had no idea why I laughed or why suddenly I felt…not happier around you, more...comfortable. I wasn't always happy around you…you know that as well as I do. I was always comfortable. You always made me feel like I was safe and protected. I hated my weakness. I remember seeing the flicker in your eyes…that day I laughed.

If I had known then, I would have stayed silent.

I remember the first time you touched me. I was breathing hard from sparring. I was tired, and I never saw you come up behind me. I remember turning to leave, finding you there. Suddenly, your fingertips were on my forehead, wiping the sweat away lightly. I remember I shivered. Your touch had made me cold. You laughed and said something about working too hard. You never had to sweat during spars. I think I flushed…with anger at your insinuation. I remember you handing me a towel and then walking away before I had a chance to say anything.

If I had known then, I would have refused it.

I remember the first time you kissed me. We had gone to a meeting at the school. After it was over, you offered to walk me home. I had been interested in you for some time now, and I didn't refuse. As we walked, you didn't say much. But then, you never did. I think I babbled. You said nothing until we got to my door. As I opened my door, I felt you touch my shoulder lightly. I turned to ask you what you wanted. I remember it was in the middle of my question, your lips touched mine.

If I had known then, I would have rejected you.

I remember our first date. You showed up on my doorstep at midnight, breathing lightly. I was surprised to see you. You asked me if I would come with you. When I asked where, you shook your head. It was a secret, you told me. I remembered the kiss, and I wanted more. So I went. You took me to the lake. We jumped into the freezing water, hand-in-hand. You kissed me in the water. I remember how warm it made me feel. We were pressed together, relying on each other for warmth. I remember thanking you for the date.

If I had known then, I would have refused you.

I remember our first night together. You snuck out of your house to come stay with me. I lived alone; it was easier that way. I opened the door for you, and you ducked inside, kissing me fervently. My arms were locked around your neck…I don't know why you always made me feel so desperate. It must have been hours before I broke away. I was always the first to stop. We spent the night on the couch, watching old movies. I was lying on top of you, held firmly in your arms. I remember being happy you had come.

If I had known then, I would have forbidden you.

I remember the day you moved in. You finally told your family about me. They were not pleased with your choice of boyfriends. I was so angry with them, but you just accepted it. Fate, you told me. It was Destiny for your family to reject you. You were always like that; Fate explained everything. I used to get so angry when you said that. You would just smile and kiss me. I don't think I was ever angry for very long. You had moved your things into my room. I remember watching, loving that you lived in my house.

If I had known then, I would have looked away.

I remember waking up next to you every morning. I always woke up first. You lay on the white sheets, your black hair spilling over the pillow. I could sit there for hours, just watching you as you slept, your chest rising and falling slowly. Eventually, I would lose my will and kiss you awake. You never minded. You would wrap your arms around my waist, pulling me closer. I would have both hands on your chest, tucking my head beneath your chin. We would lie like that until it was time to get up. I remember lying there, loved.

If I had known then, I would have gotten up.

I remember the day you died. That morning was different. I didn't want you to leave. I couldn't explain it; I had a bad feeling, I said. You laughed, caressing the side of my face. You swore you'd be fine. Fate would have its way, you said. I begged you, _begged_ you, not to go and leave me alone. You just kissed me and went to get ready. I was angry. As you walked out the door, you called out a good-bye to me. I didn't answer you. I remember being told you were dead…after I let you go.

If I had known then, I would have stopped you.

Pain is just too much…but I want to remember.

**-OWARI-**


End file.
